When you’re trying to change something—whether it’s leaving a toxic job, starting a regular exercise routine, or to stop overcommitting—it can feel frustrating when progress isn’t linear. One day you’re motivated, the next you’re stuck in old habits. Sound familiar?

Rather than aiming to excel or innovate, her primary focus is on avoiding criticism from her boss and preventing any possible failure. This avoidance motivation keeps her in a state of high anxiety, leading her to over-prepare presentations and avoid taking on bold projects, not because she lacks skill, but because she’s terrified of the potential backlash if something goes wrong.

Hyper-independence can feel like a strength. You handle everything. You don’t need help. You push through no matter what. People admire your work ethic, your ability to stay in control, and how “strong” you are.

We all know the feeling—you’re faced with a problem, and instead of doing something about it, you analyze it from every angle. You dissect what went wrong, why it happened, and how unfair it is. But somehow, after all that thinking, the problem is still… there.

You go to bed early, get your full eight hours, and still wake up feeling like you got hit by a truck. You schedule a lowkey weekend, thinking that might fix the problem, but instead of feeling recharged, you feel even more drained. Maybe you’ve noticed that even when you sit down to relax, your mind keeps racing, or your body still feels tense, like it’s bracing for something.

Let’s talk about uncertainty—that slippery, uncomfortable space where your brain likes to spiral. If you’ve ever found yourself awake at 3am mentally rehearsing worst-case scenarios, then this blog is for you. But why does uncertainty feel like a psychological itch we just can’t scratch? And more importantly, what can we actually do about it?

We all want a great relationship, right? But sometimes, what we think of as "high standards" might actually be perfectionism in disguise—and it could be causing more harm than good. When we expect too much from our partners (or ourselves), we're setting everyone up for frustration and disappointment. And the worst part? We might not even realize it's happening.

If you've ever been told you're “too sensitive” or wondered why certain situations feel more overwhelming to you than others, you might be a highly sensitive person (HSP), as am I. No, it’s not just in your head—there’s actual science behind it. High sensitivity is a real personality trait, and if you often find yourself feeling overstimulated, emotionally drained, or anxious in certain environments, there’s a good chance you fall into this category.

In Jonathan Haidt's book The Anxious Generation, he explains two fundamental ways our brains process the world: "discover mode" and "defend mode." These aren't just abstract concepts—they directly influence how we experience anxiety, make decisions, and live our adult lives.

Let’s get one thing straight: you and I are both addicts. No, not in the traditional sense—but our brains are hooked on dopamine......that little brain chemical often dubbed the “feel-good hormone.” But here’s the twist: it’s not always the reward itself that keeps us coming back for more—it’s the anticipation of the reward.

Have you ever felt stuck in a situation where the rewards are inconsistent, yet you can’t seem to walk away? Maybe it’s a boss who occasionally praises your hard work, but most of the time leaves you feeling invisible or undervalued. Or perhaps it’s the enjoyment of checking your phone to see if your latest social media post got any likes or comments. If so, you’ve experienced the powerful grip of intermittent reinforcement (also known as variable reinforcement) - a psychological phenomenon that keeps both humans and animals hooked far more effectively than consistent rewards ever could.

The start of a new year always brings an opportunity for reflection and renewal. As we dive into 2025, many of us are jotting down resolutions like eating better, exercising more, or maybe even reading that stack of books gathering dust on the shelf. But here's a resolution that might not be on your list yet: practicing forgiveness.